Hello all!
I must admit that I get a bit frustrated by the "poor me" attitudes of some people towards their weight-loss journeys!
They seem to want to lose all their weight as quickly as possible WITHOUT putting in the hard yards! They just don't seem to get it!
The result we get out of anything equals the amount of effort we're prepared to put into it!
I have lots of HEROS on the message boards! Those that have or are still putting in the hard yards and slogging along to goal - becoming happier, healthier & slimmer with increased self-esteem and self-worth to boot!
As my title says, I brought up 6 boys, mostly without any support and so many people said to me "you're so lucky that they all turned out so well"!
LUCK had absolutely nothing to do with it!! They were given boundaries along with lots of love and support! Admittedly, a couple kicked the traces during their older teenage years but because of the solid foundations they had, they soon got through their wild days and are now all wonderful young men, providing me with 6 amazing grandchildren who are being brought up the same - to be respectful and to be appreciative.
So yes, I get annoyed when I read the "poor me" threads! There are so many out there that have genuine problems who are still managing to change their lives around and do the "hard yards" to make that possible!
What do you think? Do you think I'm too harsh with such people? Love to hear from you! Gae oxoxox
PS - NO CHANGE in my weight-loss this week in spite of the increase in exercise - looking forward to a decent loss next week!!
Hi Gae,
ReplyDeleteSounds like you've got some great kids there!
I agree with you about the "poor me" people, I get mad too!! Unfortunately, I think they occur in all aspects of life and they make me mad in all those too lol
Altho, I must say that in the past I have caught myself thinking such thoughts. But I'm working through my thought processes to stop all the nasties from taking over! To me its as much a head game as anything and I'm enjoying the journey!
I typically stay the same when I increase exercise, you'll be on fire next week! Look out scales!!
Stay classy
Hope x
Hi Gae,
ReplyDeleteI have the utmost respect for you! I am raising 1 boy on my own and that is hard enough let alone 6. Most of the time I feel like I have no idea what I am doing and I lay awake at night and worry about him and how he will turn out. I am trying to work through all my negative thoughts and have taken to looking for things that make me happy hoping it will make my thoughts happy. Last night it was a mani and a pedi...hard to have poor me thoughts when someone is massaging your tired feet!!
Im sure your sons are just as proud of you as you are of them!
I think I know what has prompted this Gae. I saw a thread yesterday where you gave 'tough' advice, and it was warranted. But somebody basically told you to back off. I was sorry they did that because you of all people are a fantastic supportive cheerleader for us all. You gave an honest answer, which included a bit of a kick in the butt, but you did it with love! I had no problems with your answer.
ReplyDelete-Wishing we could lose weight doesn't cut it. -Working at it is what we need to do.
On another note - a few years ago a friend came to stay with us with her 4 delightful kids. Quite a few of them were teenagers at that time. After 5 days of loving having all these kids together I looked at my friend and said, "Aren't we lucky with our kids?"
Her reply was, "Don't you think we made our luck? We worked damn hard to have such nice kids." Your comments about being lucky with your boys reminded me of that conversation.
Hi Gae,
ReplyDeleteTotally in agreeance with you.
The main reasons for people to have this attitude, is that as children some of us had parents that would help us a little too much. They might not have known it, but they were really causing their children to have a certain reliance on others. That if things got too hard someone else would help them or do it for them. Also, some people with very low self confidence revert back to another very big childhood action - If you get hurt or upset, your parents would give you hugs and love and attention to make you feel better. Therefore subconciously, they relate being hurt or upset, to getting those things. Its not the persons fault, or the parents. Its a subconcious thing, and as I said for people with low self esteem, playing 'poor me' gives them what they crave.
So tough love is required to break that cycle. Because to get through life you cant be reliant on everyone else to make you feel good - you should be able to feel good within yourself!
You sound like youve done a great job with your children Gae.
I couldn't agree more with you. I think people are too impatient and expect the average of 1kg a week, just not going to happen love ! You have to put the hard yards it, after all nothing in life comes easy. Love Martine xx
ReplyDeletetotally agree. Although at the moment I am probably in that poor me stage. But in saying that...I don't expect anything except what i put in. Weight loss is hard and so it should be. We put the effort into getting big, it shouldn't be a breeze to get small.
ReplyDeleteThere is one thing to vent, another thing to expect things to come to you. You must go out and get what you want! whinging and moaning about it won't help!
I get annoyed with people who expect +1kg weight loss each week. I absolutely work my butt off each week with exercise, following points, cutting out on the things I love (wine, i miss wine!) and I can't remember the last time I lost over 1kg in one week. But I get over it pretty quickly by looking at what I have done so far, in a reasonably short time. I look at the things other then kgs too. I know that the longer it takes the longer it will stay off. That is important. And I am going to know that at the end, I DID IT. Not luck, not a pill, not a drink, not surgery...but ME. The sense of pride I am going to get from MY achievement will be sickly to everyone else! :)
Hi Gae,
ReplyDeleteI can see where you are coming from Mate. I was worried about you yesterday and today, that's why I'm here lol! There are a lot of people that come and go on the boards. Sometimes I have a lot of patience with them and try to help...other times I think, Gosh, what are YOU whinging for, I wish I had it so easy!
When it comes down to it though, I care about you a lot more than some fly by night who might be gone in a week, so please don't let people's reactions get to you. The people who know you understand you've worked hard at this, and they should be so lucky to get your advice.
Big Hugs
Lin
Hi Gae,
ReplyDeleteJust wanted to thank you for the lovely comment on my blog - I appreciate your support, as always!
I don't think you're too harsh at all - sometimes we all need a bit of a "reality check" - as plenty of people have mentioned, we didn't put this weight on overnight so why do we expect to lose it overnight (though gosh, wouldn't that be lovely)!
I guess my attitude towards myself is, "you did the crime so now you do the time!"
Bummer about the weigh in, I think I will be on track to stay the same this week - I lose well one week, followed by a miniscule loss or no change the following week. Isn't it funny how our bodies work?
All the best
Kasey xo
Gae, are you ok? I haven't seen you posting - or maybe I've just missed them. I always find your comments honest and motivating. I appreciate your support and am inspired by your journey.
ReplyDeleteBelinda
HI Gae
ReplyDeleteKeep doing what you doing - I have a a lot of respect for you - you help me more than you probably know.